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It’s not Laziness and It’s Not You

This is by far one of the most important lessons I’ve learned since becoming involved in disability spaces. And I will repeat it as many times as you need.

There is no such thing as laziness.

There is a real reason why you haven’t been able to complete that project you’re working on, or make that phone call you’ve been avoiding. There is always a reason why you’re not doing what you “should” be doing.  It’s not laziness. It’s not you. But it is something and it’s worth figuring out what exactly it is.

Not only because it will help you do the thing, but also because of what you might learn about yourself and your needs.

For example, did you know that procrastination is an energy-conservation mechanism built into your body? It’s meant to keep you from spending too much energy on something that won’t give enough reward. Remember that we are animals, and although our instincts are often overridden by our intellect, we are constantly being affected by natural mechanisms that we have no control over. Why face that terrifying ordeal if you don’t have to? If your life is not in danger? If it’s not going to directly result in a filling meal?

And it’s not always about anxiety and energy conservation, sometimes it’s extreme discomfort or pain due to a medical condition or sensory sensitivities. Sometimes it’s because from the angle you’re looking at the problem it’s way too complicated or overwhelming. Sometimes it’s only about energy conservation because of extreme or chronic fatigue. Sometimes it’s only about anxiety because you’re facing something triggering.

You are not being lazy. You are running into an invisible obstacle.

So I recommend you take a deep breath, and start looking for that obstacle. And ask for help from someone who would never call you “lazy”.

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